


Lost Heart

by Senigata



Series: Hopeful Horizons [8]
Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Angst, F/M, Grief/Mourning, It's a sad one.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 17:06:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21274700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Senigata/pseuds/Senigata
Summary: [Sequel to Golden Respite]Reeling from the loss of Aerith, the party decides to spend the night at Icicle Inn. With nothing much to do, Tifa is left dealing with her own doubts and anxieties in regards to Cloud. Amids the conflict inside herself, she makes a discovery about her departed friend.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back and I hope you're ready for some HURT in this one.  
I want to give a special little shoutout to Kelleyj17 for letting me adopt a small idea of hers: thanks!
> 
> Well then shall we?

**Lost Heart**

She was dead.

Aerith was dead. Tifa still couldn't believe it; like it hadn't sunken in yet. But her fingertips still tingled from when she had caressed the woman's still warm cheek, and she had been with everyone as Cloud had laid her body to rest in the waters of the nearby lake.

After that they had been on a non-stop track towards their final destination, ever northward to Gaea's Cliff. Or—

She looked at Cloud's unconscious form.

—that had been the plan.

But once they had made it to Icicle Inn, the last bit of human civilization before the Great Glacier, Shinra had appeared, led by none other than Elena.

The Turk had always been temperamental, a trait that had gotten her into quite a bit of trouble during the whole Corneo mess in Wutai, but the look of rage and the barely held back tears told her enough to know that this time it was more personal.

Cloud and her had stared at one another for the longest time before Elena finally spoke up.

"_It's your fault Tseng..."_ but Cloud didn't let her finish that sentence, as he put his hands up.

"_OK, you wanna fight me so bad?"_ were his words as he removed his bracers and gloves, then stabbed his sword angrily into the snow, shaking not unlike Elena just a few feet away from them. "_No magic, no weapons. Just you and me. We'll be each other's punching bags."_

Her answer had been to raise her fists as she took a fighting position, and soon after they were at each other's throats. The Shinra troopers and Avalanche could only watch as they punched each other, and Tifa understood that what both needed right now was to vent.

Nobody knew what happened to Tseng at the Temple of the Ancients. They could only presume he was dead. And Cloud, while putting up a brave front, must have felt the loss of Aerith deeper than anyone.

In the end they both ended up knocking each other out. While Barret took care of Cloud, Tifa had kindly given the Turk a heal spell before both troopers dragged her off; Elena was Shinra and Shinra was the enemy, but she understood mourning like that.

After that, they had carried Cloud over to the eponymous inn the little snowy town was named after, and pretty much rented the entire place for their group.

That had been hours earlier, and Tifa had since then spent the entire day by his side. From what it looked like outside the window, the sun was starting to set, despite it not being very late in the day. She heard stories of how far in the north days could be very short and nights very long in the winter. Tifa suspected that further north, night time could last for days on end.

She was exhausted. They all were. Everything happened so fast since the Temple of the Ancients where Cloud had lost control and attacked Aerith, shocked that he had given Sephiroth the Black Materia that would summon Meteor.

Cloud, too, must have been exhausted, even with his insistence that they couldn't waste any time. And that exhaustion had finally caught up with him, as his body now forced him to rest. It reminded her of the day she had found him in Midgar months ago.

With her hand, she brushed away some of his hair before moving it to cup his cheek.

_What is happening?_ she wondered. Ever since the Black Materia incident Cloud seemed to be slipping further and further away.

"_I'm afraid...of myself,"_ he had told Barret and her after he had woken up in Gongaga.

Gongaga...

That they would come across Zack's hometown almost casually after the Gold Saucer was a weird coincidence. And if the older woman, that turned out to be Zack's mother, hadn't approached them because she recognized Cloud's outfit as SOLDIER, she might have never known.

That they would go there after they had been forced to knock him out felt like a cruel twist of fate.

And if they hadn't managed to bring him to his senses in the Forgotten Capital he might have been the one to— she shook her head violently. She didn't want to think about the possibility.

Ever since they had arrived in Nibelheim, cleverly reconstructed by Shinra as they had learned after a thorough investigation of the town, it felt like things were slowly coming to a head, and she was afraid that she was unable to stop it. But they had to move forward, otherwise all might be lost and every death would have been in vain.

Was this what they were calling being caught between a rock and a hard place?

A soft scratching sound caught her attention before she heard the sound of the handle being pushed down and the door opened. Tifa turned around to see Red XIII; no, Nanaki, as he was truly called, even if he had accepted Red XIII as a nickname for their group, lowering himself back onto his front paws before walking towards her, his head held lower than usual.

"Are you alright?" he asked her softly, and she could hear the tiredness in his voice.

"I'm alive," she said, trying to get some cheer into her voice. He released a little chuckle and sat down beside her, the warmth of his flaming tail giving her a little bit of comfort.

They watched Cloud for a bit before Red spoke up.

"You've been with him this whole time," he said and looked at her with his one eye. "You should get some rest."

"I'm fine."

"And I insist," he said and nudged her a little with his head. "Come on. I promise I'll come get you as soon as he wakes up."

Tifa released a deep sigh and closed her eyes for a moment, before nodding. "Fine."

Slowly, she rose to her feet and, giving Cloud one last look, left the room, closing the door behind her.

On her way downstairs she passed by Yuffie's room and could hear soft crying from behind the door. She stopped for a moment, debating if she should go inside, but decided against it. If Yuffie was holing herself up then she didn't want to talk.

Downstairs she found Cait Sith sitting in front of the furnace, his riding bot resting against the wall while he was looking contemplatively into the flames, or at least as much as a cat robot could.

"Tifa," he greeted her, and despite being a machine managed to sound just as tired as the rest of them. "How's Cloud?"

"Still hasn't woken up," she replied.

"I see..." he said and returned to looking into the fire. She wasn't sure what to think of him. He was a spy for Shinra, yet in the end he had helped them get the Black Materia by sacrificing one of his bodies.

It was complicated, like so many things with their group.

After taking another set of stairs she found herself inside the basement that served as the local bar. She spotted Barret and Cid sitting at the counter, quietly downing shots, the bottle of whiskey placed between the two men.

They nodded towards her as she approached them, but didn't say anything otherwise. Her eyes fell on the bottle between them. Just as Barret was about to take the bottle, she grabbed it instead and took a large swig from it. The sight made Cid nearly choke on his drink, while Barret just turned to the barkeeper and held up some Gil to buy a new bottle, already knowing that they wouldn't be getting it back anytime soon.

"Wow, sis, you sure can handle your booze," Cid said to her when she finally lowered the bottle.

"She's a bartender," Barret commented, saying a quick thanks when he was handed a new bottle. "Gonna be able to drink some of these suckers under the table."

He made her sound like she drank the stuff like it was water, but she couldn't be bothered to correct him this time. Right now she needed a drink.

Without a word she moved away from them and sat down at one of the tables. Once seated she took another swig, the liquor leaving a burning trail down her throat on its way into her stomach.

She sat there in contemplative silence, staring into the lamp that sat on the middle of the table. From out of the corner of her eyes she could make out the barkeeper exchanging a few words with Barret, before stepping out from behind the bar and walking over to her.

"Miss, have you eaten anything yet?" he asked. Tifa turned her head to look at him. He was an older man, his beard and hair long since having gone gray, but he looked to be in good health, not the slightest bit of a hunch to his back as he stood before her.

"Got a healthy breakfast this morning." If their rations could be called such anyway. "I'm fine."

"You're going to get yourself sick if you just drink this." He pointed at the bottle in her hand. "I'm afraid I have to insist. Your friends agree."

She shot Barret and Cid a look, who returned it with concern in their eyes, before releasing a sigh and turning her gaze back to the man in front of her. Tifa didn't exactly have much of an appetite, but he was right and she had been in his position more than once in the past as well.

"Fine," she said, while placing the bottle on the table, and folded her hands. "What's on the menu?"

He counted off a few simple meals, but none seemed to be particularly enticing until he said the name of a dish that caught her attention.

"Wait, what was the last one?" she asked just as he was naming another dish.

"Knoephla soup."

"That one!"

The man's eyebrows shot up and he gave her a little grin. "You're in luck. The wife's made some earlier. It's one of the more popular dishes. I'll be right back."

As he left to get the soup, Tifa leaned back into her seat. Of all the possible dishes, they served the one her mother used to make back when she was alive.

Maybe it would manage to cheer her up a bit. She could certainly use it.

It didn't take long for him to return with a tablet on which a steaming bowl of soup, a bit of bread and a glass were placed. He placed it all in front of her.

"Enjoy your meal," the man said with a smile and returned to his place behind the bar. Taking a whiff of the soup, she felt her mouth water and appetite rapidly returning. Gathering some of it on the spoon provided to her, she guided it to her lips and put it into her mouth.

Her eyes closed at the taste and a feeling of nostalgia overcame her. It tasted just like she remembered; like her mother had cooked it instead of a stranger running an inn at the edge of the world.

A taste of a home long gone. It made her sad, yet somehow happy, and as the food entered her stomach she felt herself warm up, and some life returned to her tired body.

With a small smile she took the bottle and poured some of the whiskey into the glass, then broke a piece off the bread to dunk it into the soup.

She enjoyed her meal, taking her time to savor every spoon, letting it warm her soul bit by bit. After she was done she washed it down with one final shot of whiskey and rose to her feet, walking over to the counter.

"Thanks. You were right, I needed that one," she said to the barkeeper. "It was delicious."

"I'll be sure to let the wife know." He chuckled.

"I might have to ask her for the recipe later."

"I'm sure she will be happy to write it down for you."

Tifa walked over to Barret and Cid. "Sorry for stealing your bottle."

"Don't worry about it. We're all stressed to hell and back," Cid said and downed another shot. He could handle his liquor quite well, too, it seemed.

"Try to get some rest, will ya?" Barret said to her, all fatherly concern.

"I think I'll take a bit of a walk for now," she said and waved them goodbye before heading up the stairs. Cait Sith had moved from his position in front of the stove. Maybe he had moved upstairs to power down?

In the main hall, Tifa put on one of the coats that Barret had bought in a local store and headed outside.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Icicle Inn was quiet as she stepped outside. Only a few people were out; mostly children playing in the snow. When she was a child she had loved to play in the winter snow as well.

Her eyes turned to the giant mountain in the north, dwarfing even Mt. Nibel in size. It had long since grown dark as the sun had set and the stars glistened in the sky above. Accompanying them was an otherworldly glow that she only ever heard about, but had never seen with her own eyes. The Northern Lights.

She stared at them in awe, her breath forming little clouds with every exhale, as patterns of green and purple glowed above her, moving like waves on the sea. It was a beautiful sight.

Absentmindedly, she reached into her skirt pocket and pulled out her phone to take a picture of it.

As she put her phone back she noticed a familiar figure moving about in the distance, unmistakable due to the crimson cape he wore. Vincent. She had been wondering where had gone off to.

"Vincent!" she called out and walked towards him, the snow crunching under every step she took. At the sound of her voice he turned towards her.

"Tifa," he greeted, his voice deeper than someone would expect of a person such as him and his face was a mask of stony neutrality, like a statue come to life. "How is Cloud?"

"Still asleep," she replied and looked at him. How he could deal with this cold without wearing a coat she had no idea. Maybe it was because of his own unique nature? "What are you doing out here?"

"We're heading up there." He pointed his clawed hand towards the giant mountain in the distance. "I was asking around if there might be an alternate route instead of going through the Great Glacier."

"And, is there?" she asked, pulling the hood of her coat up and placing her hands into the pockets of her coat to warm them up a little.

He shook his head. "None."

She was afraid he would say that.

"I spoke with the family of a man named Holzoff. Apparently he's living at the foot of Gaea's Cliff. They offered for us to use their map of the area," he said and started to walk once more, with Tifa falling into step with him. It unnerved her a little that he seemed to be making barely any sound on the snow as he walked. "I also heard some rumors. Of a man passing through here recently, heading into the very same direction."

"Sephiroth?"

"Who else?" Who else indeed. It was always Sephiroth, and he was always one damned step ahead of them.

"What else did you hear?" she asked.

"Just some local stories. A snow woman that lives out at the glacier and hates the hot springs." He did something of a shrug. "A myth to be sure, but the hot spring part sounded like useful information in case we need to warm up."

"But that's not why you're out here right now," Tifa pointed out and Vincent gave her a sideways glance.

"Correct. I heard something else that was worth investigating."

"What's that?"

"Shinra has been here before. Over twenty years ago," he told her and led her to a house on the far left side of town, far away from prying eyes, but still close enough to be part of town. "The trail leads here."

"Looks abandoned. So are we going inside?" Tifa asked while pulling the coat tighter around herself and rubbing her legs together. She should definitely invest in a pair of tights tomorrow. Vincent turned his head towards her.

"You know, you can go back if you want."

"I wanna know what Shinra was looking for, too." Tifa shook her head. "Besides, I think I could use something to do right now."

Vincent looked at her for a moment, his crimson eyes fixed on hers, before he eventually nodded. "Very well."

He placed a hand on the door handle and, to her surprise, the door opened without any problem. From the look of the place she would have expected the door to be frozen solid. But instead of the freezing cold she expected, a pleasant warmth invited them in.

Tifa and Vincent shared a look, his eyebrows having risen just a tiny fraction, before entering the house. It was completely dark inside, but from the way the floor creaked underneath her feet it must have been made of wood.

"Shouldn't it be freezing in here?" Tifa asked and pulled off her hood, trying to see something in the darkness.

"Either this building has very good insulation or—"she heard the sound of him flipping a switch and the lights turned on. "—or there's still power."

With the lights now on Tifa took a look around. The floor was indeed wood, but a very dark one, and the entire place looked more like a lab instead of a home, with all the computers and other machines standing around the place. In the corner she saw a long table.

Everything was covered in dust, a sign that truly no one had been here in for a long time. "How can this place still have power?"

"If I had a guess I would say a geothermal generator. An old steam or fuel generator wouldn't be able to power all this," he said and waved his hand at all the equipment that had come to life one after another. "And there are hot springs in the area, so it stands to reason. That means whoever lived here was smart."

"Hmm. There's a set of stairs," Tifa said and pointed to her right.

"How about you have a look downstairs while I look around up here?" Vincent asked.

"Sure," Tifa said and headed down the stairs. This area looked far more warm and homely, with a huge bed big enough for two placed on the carpeted floor, drawers, and a back area that must lead to a kitchen as well as a bathroom. But what really caught her attention was the crib in the corner of the room. As she took a step towards it, her foot collided with a book lying on the floor. Curious, she picked it up and stepped up to the crib, running her fingers along its edge.

A small family lived here. Did Shinra abduct them?

Releasing a sigh she opened the book and flipped through the pages. A lot of scientific stuff that she didn't understand, but one name in particular caught her attention.

_Jenova..._

Sephiroth's _mother_, the creature that they had fought two times already.

_What's the meaning of this?_ she wondered when suddenly Vincent's voice echoed from upstairs.

"Tifa!"

Closing the book, she tossed it onto the bed and headed back upstairs, where Vincent was standing in front of a terminal.

"What did you find?"

"Videos. Reports it seems. Most have been removed, but these four—" he said and pointed at a list of four names. "—seem to be in good condition."

"So let's watch them."

"Mhm." He nodded and started _The Original Crisis._

On the monitor appeared a woman in a red dress and a man in a lab coat.

"_Camera's ready! Infalna, please tell us about the Cetra,"_ the man said and the camera adjusted itself to focus on the woman. Tifa could swear something about her was familiar and that name rang a bell, but she couldn't put her finger on it.

"_2000 years ago, our ancestors, the Cetra, heard the cries. The first ones to discover the planet's wound were the Cetra of the Knowlespole," _the woman said. She went on to explain that the Cetra called the area of the Great Glacier "Knowlespole", then talked about something called a planet reading, the power to talk with the planet, and how thousands of them had tried to heal the wound caused by something that fell from the sky, but couldn't due to the severity of it.

The woman released a shaky breath.

"_Infalna, let's take a break,"_ the man in the lab coat said and turned around to face the camera. Vincent paused the video.

"That man..."

"Do you know him?" Tifa asked.

Vincent shook his head. "Not personally, and I only saw him once from afar. That is Professor Gast Faremis." He pointed at the man. "Head of Project Jenova, and the man whose research would lead to the creation of Sephiroth."

Tifa's eyes went wide in surprise. The head of Project Jenova... "What was he doing here though? And with a Cetra no less?"

"Only one way to find out," Vincent said and unpaused the video.

"_No no, I'm alright,"_ she reassured the man and continued. "_When the Cetra...were preparing to part with the land they loved _it _appeared, looking like their dead fathers and mothers, their brothers and sisters."_

"_Who was the thing that appeared?"_

"_The one that __had__ injured the planet, the Calamity from the Skies." _The woman buried her face in her hands and described how it deceived the Cetra and infected them with something that turned them into monsters, before moving on to do the same with other Cetra tribes.

"_You don't look well, let's continue another day,"_ the man named Gast said and the recording stopped.

Tifa and Vincent looked at one another before he started the next video called _What is "Weapon"?_

The video started with a clarification that the so called Calamity from the Skies was Jenova and that Shinra had mistaken the alien creature for a Cetra. After that she explained that the planet couldn't fully heal as long as Jenova existed and thus started to manifest giant creatures that would fight this alien being, but by the time they were complete a handful of Cetra had already defeated Jenova, but it still existed and thus so do the Weapons, sleeping somewhere until the day they were released to destroy the enemies of the planet.

A shudder went up her spine at the thought that somewhere, gigantic monsters were waiting to be unleashed. What if they deemed humanity as the planet's enemy?

"So Gast was doing research on the true history of the Cetra outside his original research..." Vincent muttered.

"What's this?" Tifa asked and read the next video name out loud. "_Confidential: Daughter's Report, 10__th_ _day after birth_?"

"Hmm," was the only sound Vincent made and started the video.

It started with Professor Gast fiddling with the camera and Infalna coming up the stairs.

"_What are you doing, Profes—I mean, honey?"_

Tifa's eyebrows rose in surprise. Honey?

"_I'm thinking __about making another__ video, but it's not working the way I want it to,"_ he said with a chuckle.

"_What do you want to record? Is there something I haven't mentioned?"_

"_No, that's not it,"_ he waved her off. "_I'm going to record my beautiful daughter, of course!"_

Infalna laughed. "_First we need to figure out a name, we can take videos later!"_

"_I've already decided on one a while ago. If the baby's a girl I wanted her name to be Aerith."_

A sound of surprise escaped her, and even Vincent, who was usually so stoic, seemed to be shocked by the revelation. These were Aerith's parents!

Now she remembered where she had heard the woman's name before. Hojo had mentioned her at Costa del Sol. And now that she took a closer look, the resemblance was uncanny.

She felt her heart break in two at the realization that Aerith had been so close to learning about her past when she died.

"_You are so selfish! But Aerith is a good name!" _she laughed again. "_Especially considering it came out of that forgetful head of yours."_

"_Right!?"_ He too laughed before realizing that the camera was running. "_Oh, the video..."_

The video ended there.

They both stood there in stunned silence. The crib downstairs, it had belonged to Aerith. Tifa pressed her eyes shut and deeply inhaled and exhaled as she tried to keep the tears at bay. This revelation was coming too soon, the wound was still too fresh.

Wordlessly Vincent started the final video. Like the last one it showed an eager Professor Gast and a playfully exasperated Infalna scolding him. They exchanged a few gentle words that told Tifa just how much the two loved each other, when suddenly there was a knock on the door.

Infalna went to open the door, but once she had done so ran back to the man, fear evident in her eyes. "_It's them!"_

Then a very familiar laugh could be heard and next to her Vincent stiffened. It was Hojo, much younger looking and actually well groomed, flanked by two Shinra troopers.

"_I've been searching for you, Infalna, or rather Cetra,"_ he said and grinned at both of them. "_Long time no see, Professor Gast_."

"_Hojo, how did you..."_

"_Find you?"_ Hojo snorted. "_Believe me, I had to turn every stone to find you out here. Two years, that's how much I had to wait for this new sample."_

"_New sample!?" _Professor Gast stepped in front of Infalna, who had her face buried in her hands. "_You don't mean Aerith!?"_

"_Aerith? What a nice name." _Hojo laughed again.

They watched as Infalna begged for the safety of her child in exchange for her cooperation, but Hojo wouldn't have any of it, saying that they all were needed for experimentation.

_What a sick bastard,_ Tifa thought as she clenched her hands into fists.

The video feed came to an abrupt halt when Hojo noticed the camera and ordered one of the troopers to take it out. Sounds of a struggle followed, another gunshot and the sound of a body hitting the floor.

"_Darling!"_ they heard Infalna scream.

"_Don't forget the child,_" they heard Hojo order before something seemed to have caught his attention. "_Hmm, videos? About the Ancients...and Weapons!?"_

He laughed again. _"What a mountain of treasure. Thank you, professor!"_

And with that, the video ended.

So that was how Aerith and her mother had landed in Shinra custody. Years later, Infalna would escape, but be fataly wounded in the process, and with her dying breath she would entrust her only daughter to a kind woman in the slums.

"Ironic," Vincent said after a while. "That the man, that would help in the creation of Sephiroth, was the father of the very woman that died by Sephiroth's blade. Fate truly is a cruel thing."

Tifa couldn't agree more.

"So Hojo took all the videos."

"Yes, but he missed his chance to erase this final evidence of his crime." Vincent let out a little snort. "Sloppy, Hojo, very sloppy."

"We'll make him pay for this. One way or another," Tifa promised.

"That we will."

Tifa looked around. Part of her wanted to look around, if only to find something that might have belonged to her friend, but she decided against it. "Let's go. There's nothing left here."

"Agreed."

They both left the house, and all its memories, behind. As they headed back to the center of town, Vincent stopped, making Tifa halt in her tracks.

"Are you going to keep this a secret from Cloud?" he asked bluntly, and she felt his eyes bore into her.

"What do you think I should do?" She asked with a defeated sigh. "You must have realized too that he isn't well. Telling him about what we found out about Aerith could only make it worse."

"Yes. That much is evident." He agreed. "But there's more that you're hiding from him, isn't there?"

There was. The evidence was hanging right around her neck, hidden beneath her clothes. That Cloud's memories were false. But...she just couldn't...

"I'm afraid," Tifa finally admitted, and she felt her eyes burn as tears started to well up. "Afraid of what might happen. It's like we're standing on the edge of a giant abyss and just the tiniest of movements could cause us to fall."

Vincent stared at her, the lower half of his face obscured by the collar of his cape. "I'm not judging you. I know exactly where you're coming from."

"Do you?"

"Years ago I spoke up about something I couldn't let go and in turn I paid the price." He lifted his clawed hand for emphasis. "Our actions have consequences. It's only natural to be afraid. In the end you can only do what you think is right."

With these words he resumed his walk.

"Vincent..."

"We're heading off to fight Sephiroth tomorrow. We need to be focused, now more so than ever. Perhaps it is better to wait until the deed is done," he said, then stalked off, his cape bellowing with every step as he left her to her own thoughts.

What was she supposed to do? She didn't know!

She clutched her head, nails digging into her scalp, and she wanted to scream, to let out all those bottled up feelings and doubts.

_Jessie... Aerith...what am I supposed to do?_ She silently asked her departed friends. But of course no answer came, instead only the sounds of the wind from the mountains hailed her call. Shivering, she pulled her coat closer to herself once more.

A voice startled her out of her thoughts and she turned to see Cloud heading towards her, dressed in a coat similar to hers.

_Cloud!_ He was finally awake. The dread inside her heart made way for joy, and she jogged over to meet him halfway.

"Are you alright?" Tifa asked.

"Been better," he answered her honestly. "Elena can pack quite a punch."

"I'm glad..." she sniffed the air for a second. "Did you drink?"

"Only two shots," he said sheepishly and scratched the back of his head. "To warm up a bit. It's freezing out here. I met Vincent, he told me where to find you."

"Oh..." Tifa swallowed. "Did he say something?"

"He told me he found someone that's willing to lend us a map of the Great Glacier. Why?"

Tifa breathed a sigh of relief through her nose. "Just making sure he didn't forget," she lied.

"Anyway. I heard from the others that you've been watching me for most of the day and I...I guess I just wanna say thanks," he said and out of the blue gathered her in a hug. "These last few days have been hell, but you've been by my side this entire time to reassure me."

Tifa was too stunned to say anything, or rather, too afraid, so instead she leaned into the embrace and closed her eyes. She knew that she couldn't keep it from him forever, but even if it was selfish, she wanted to pretend just a little more.

"Cloud..." Tifa said after she could finally trust her words again. "Can we stay like this, just for a bit longer?"

"Mhm." He nodded.

"Thanks," she said with a small smile, and buried her face into his shoulder. She wanted to stay close to him, seeking silent comfort from the warmth of his body for as long as possible. It felt like the world could be falling apart beneath their feet at any moment. But despite her doubts and worries there was one fact that remained, and that was that she loved him.

Maybe it would be easier if she didn't; would make her able to confront him about everything. But nobody ever said that love would be easy.

After a while Tifa took a step back, smile still on her lips. "We should go back before the others get worried."

"Yeah, you're right," Cloud said and they both started to walk back towards the inn.

"Have you eaten anything yet?" she asked, putting a little cheer into her voice.

"Not yet."

"They've got a pretty good Knoephla soup," she told him.

"Isn't that the soup your mother used to make?" he asked.

"Yeah." She blinked and tilted her head. "How did you know?"

"I... can't really remember. Maybe she mentioned it to my mother once?" he shrugged.

"Well, time for you to try it out then!"

The two of them returned to the inn and headed down into the bar where they ordered Cloud some of the soup. As they sat together, Barret and Cid eventually joined them, and they all shared a few drinks and talked. Cloud even laughed at one of Cid's stories, and it almost felt like everything was normal; like there was absolutely nothing to worry about.

After their two friends had bid them good night, they remained downstairs for a little longer, sharing a quiet conversation, before they headed upstairs as well. They stopped in front of her room and Tifa was about to say good night, when she noticed the look in his eyes; a haunted look that hadn't been there before. His brave facade was slowly cracking, and she felt worry creep back into her heart.

He looked just as vulnerable as he did back in Gongaga.

Taking a deep breath Tifa removed her hand from the door handle. She turned to fully face him and gathered up all of her courage. "Would you...Can I sleep next to you tonight?"

The look in his eyes became one of startled surprise.

"It's quite chilly, so…" And truth be told she didn't want to be alone tonight either.

Slowly, Cloud nodded. "OK…"

They entered Cloud's room and got into bed. The bed was large enough so that both could lie on it no problem. He offered her the pillow, but she just shook her head, instead opting to rest against his shoulder.

As they lay there, she pulled the covers over both of them, and closed her eyes. Next to her she heard Cloud's breathing go even, as he slipped off into sleep again, his body seeking the proper rest he didn't get during the day. But sleep wouldn't come to her.

Opening her eyes again she looked into his sleeping face; he seemed almost at peace. Like everything that happened these past few days had been nothing but a bad dream.

He made a little sound, before rolling over to lie on his side, his arm draping over her. One of her hands moved to cover his.

_It's going to be alright,_ she reassured herself, turning her gaze towards the window in front of them and staring up at the mountain towering in the distance. But as the Northern Lights danced across the night's sky, enshrouding Gaea's Cliff in an otherworldly glow, she heard a tiny voice whisper in the back of her mind, filling her with doubts.

A dark foreboding of things to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh, figured it was time I jumped on the Cloti angst train too, right?  
Gonna make the journey to Post Crisis worth it after all. The story will continue next week with the first chapter of **Fractured Mind**. Please look forward to it!
> 
> Read & review


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